Try Anything, Except Die

Try Anything, Except Die

Percaya nggak, kalau dimana, kapan, dan dari siapa saya dapet Quote hebat diatas ada lah di Seminar Food Estate di IPB dan dari seorang Tokoh Adat Suku Marind.

Standing applause for him :)

Manusia, diakui atau tidak, memang keseringan hidup dalam ketakutan. Takut ini takut itu, karena nanti begini dan begitu, soalnya sudah trauma dengan masa lalu yang ini dan yang itu. Saya juga officially merasa begitu, entah sudah berapa kali, dan untuk berapa persoalan :0

Jadi, kalau ditanya " apa sih yang paling lo takutin dari hidup ini? " jawaban yang akan saya utarakan adalah " mati dan ketika gue merasa takut " Sounds idiot, but that's the truth ! Saya benci rasa takut, saya nggak suka merasa ragu karena takut dan menyebabkan saya nggak jadi, atau menunda langkah saya.

Padahal, menurut Pak John (menurut saya juga), kita tuh nggak perlu takut sama apapun. Toh, hidup cuma sekali, setelah mati nanti, nggak akan ada lagi tuh rasa takut, nggak akan lagi tuh yang perlu ditakut-takutin. Kita hidup di waktu yang sangat terbatas lho, nggak pernah tau kapan tiba saatnya semua petualangan ini berakhir. Jadi, ketika masih ada kesempatan untuk mencoba banyak hal, ya cobalah !

Karena, segala sesuatu yang udah kita coba itu, pasti bakalan memberikan manfaat dan mewarnai hidup kita. Ya mau hal itu positif atau negatif, pasti tetep ada something good that worth to take kok. Pasti suatu saat bakalan bikin kita terbahak atau menangis bahagia, bakalan bikin kita makin cinta sama hidup ini.

Kalau memang ada sesuatu yang nggak pantas, nggak boleh, dan dilarang dicoba, benda itu bernama Mati.

Ya kalau saya pribadi sih memang nggak mau lah yaa, nyobain mati sebelum waktunya. Tuhan, alam, dan seluruh kerabatnya udah kasih hidup kita sebaik ini kok, malah kita sia-siain?

Daripada mikirin kematian, mending mikirin apa yang bisa dilakukan selama hidup. Berhubung itu tadi, hidup cuma sekali, dan hidup diburu waktu, jadi isi deh hari-hari kita buat melakukan apa yang ingin kita lakukan. Kecil atau besar, penting atau nggak penting, bagus atau nggak bagus, menguntungkan atau merugikan, ya lakukan. Toh kalau pun kita sampai 'salah', itu yang bikin kita nggak akan salah lagi, dan dapat banyak pelajaran.

Ibu saya juga pernah bilang, " percuma kita tahan-tahan untuk nggak melakukan suatu hal, karena kalau memang sudah takdir, kapanpun dan bagaimanapun, hal itu akan terjadi juga "

So,

Let's try anything you want to try, anything you want to coloring your life, and anything you feel that might give you the best lessons :)

_NR_

Tuesday, December 21 2010

Jiper dan Gender

Oke, entah kenapa judulnya jadi jayus begini. Biarin, biar jayus yang penting bukan Gayus, ya nggak ya nggak? Biarkan Beliau tenang di alam penjara sana ya, semoga enggak nyuap lagi lalu kabur nonton Final AFF minggu depan. Amin.

Hup ! Mari konsentrasi terhadap apa yang sebenarnya mau kamu tulis ya Nies :p

Seminggu yang lalu saya dan salah satu sahabat perempuan saya (kalau yang rajin buka twitter saya atau suka baca inbox handphone saya pasti tau, yang mana orangnya XD) mampir ke sebuah tempat nongkrong khas anak Jakarte bernama Seven Eleven, karena kantor kita berdua letaknya di Tendean, so, kita mampirnya ke Seven Eleven cabang Mampang.

Saya yang kala itu memang butuh curhat ngangguk-ngangguk aja nurutin teman saya itu buat nongkrong di SeVel (ditraktir secangkir Teh Tarik pula, hehe).

Obrolan sore yang tergelar antara saya dan teman saya itu awalnya ringan, sebatas membicarakan teman yang nggak konsisten sama kerjaan, dunia kampus, kesibukkan, dan betapa butuhnya kita sama yang namanya LI-BU-RAN. Namun, lambat laun sesi chit-chat itu berubah menjadi sesuatu yang heavier, what was that?

Saya berceloteh tentang beberapa dilemma yang sedang saya alami beberapa minggu ini, pertama masalah keluarga, mimpi, dan keheranan.

Saya sempat heran pada diri saya sendiri yang belum kunjung punya pacar. Lalu, saya lemparkan pertanyaan

" Kira-kira, kenapa ya gue kok nggak dapet-dapet pacar? "

" Banyak temen gue yang bilang karena cowok-cowok disekitar gue jiper alias parno sama gue, apa iya tah gue seserem itu? "

Teman saya menunjukkan ekspresi agak bingung yang lucu, kemudian mengambil sebuah keping potato snack dan mulai membuka mulut *

Dia : " Jiper? Maksud Lo? "

Saya : " Iya, jadi nih pernah ada dua teman cowok gue yang bilang bahwa awalnya mereka pernah punya ketertarikkan untuk deket sama gue, tapi nggak jadi karena ternyata gue adalah sosok cewek yang complicated dan berat untuk ditaklukkan... "

Dia : " Complicated karena kesibukkan dan lika-liku hidup lo? Gitu maksudnya? "

Saya : " Mungkin.... "

Dia : " Aneh ! Padahal biasanya nih, kalo gue sebagai seorang cewek, malahan makin penasaran sama cowok yang agak 'nggak biasa' kisah hidupnya "

Saya : " Iya gue juga !, berarti ini ada relasi Gender nih, budaya, cap, dan asumsi... "

Dia : " Yup ! "

~~~

Setelah hari itu, saya jadi mulai berfikir :

Apa yang menyebabkan orang berasumsi seperti itu? Mengapa mereka menyamaratakan bahwa perempuan seperti saya adalah ribet dan sulit ditaklukkan? Dan, memangnya 'dekat' berarti 'menaklukkan?

Akhirnya saya pun mulai melakukan riset kecil-kecilan mengenai hal ini, saya browsing ke beberapa forum, baca-bacain rubrik curhat di majalah online, blog, atau discussion thread, dan chatting sama salah satu teman saya yang lumayan punya banyak pengalaman berkaitan dengan ini.

Hasilnya?

Kebanyakan laki-laki itu pengennya punya pasangan yang bisa mereka bentuk, bisa mereka set sesuai keinginan mereka. Jadi, kalau sekiranya ada cewek yang kelihatan 'keras' atau punya karakter lah gitu, mereka agak-agak males ngedeketin karena takut si cewek itu sulit dibentuk.

Se-tega itu? Jahat amat sih !

Ya nggak jahat-jahat amat sih, sebetulnya. Menurut saya, mereka kayak gitu bukan karena mereka pure mau jadi seperti itu. Ada pengaruh budaya dan dekonstruksi sosial disitu. Ya, seperti kalian tahu kan, selama ini laki-laki tuh terkenal harus macho, harus juara, dan nggak boleh kalah. Nah, ini ngaruh nih ke point yang coba gue angkat ! Karena keharusan-keharusan yang nggak tau munculnya darimana itu, mereka jadi kebawa kayak gitu. Mereka jadi merasa ya memang seharusnya jadi laki-laki tuh kayak gitu. Sehingga, kebanyakan dari mereka memilih untuk nurut, dan ingin jadi 'pembentuk'.

Terbukti kan, masalah gender bukan cuma buat perempuan aja? Laki-laki juga punya peran sebagai pelaku dan korban, lho...

Padahal nggak semua laki-laki nyaman dengan cap-cap "harus" diatas, ada (mungkin banyak) kok laki-laki yang sebenarnya nyaman-nyaman aja dekat dengan cewek mana aja, seperti apa aja, seberantakan apa hidup dan gayanya. Cuma, karena lingkungan yang mencekoki dia, akhirnya dia luluh juga. (Kalau ada yang teryata nggak luluh, segera hubungi saya ya ;p)

Kalau kasusnya seperti itu, ini merugikan kedua belah pihak kan jadinya? Si cewek dan si cowok (dalam post ini saya mengambil contoh kasus untuk pasangan pada umumnya ya).

Ditambah lagi dengan sifat dasar manusia yang doyan bikin asumsi (saya juga lho). Dengan gampangnya mereka berfikir kalau itu cewek tuh 'berat' padahal, belum tentu juga kan? Kalau mereka udah males duluan dengan hidupnya si cewek itu yang katanya 'berat' ya gimana mau tau ke belakang-belakangnya? (Hiks !)

Ya kalau mau dipandang pake perspektif Hak Asasi Manusia (jadi ketularan teman saya itu deh) sih, mau laki-laki, perempuan, transgender, anonim, biseksual, atau apapun, ya nggak berhak juga ngebentuk-bentuk orang lain. Apalagi, cuma buat kenyamanan pribadi. Itu jelas merampas Hak Asasi seseorang untuk bebas berekspresi dan jadi diri sendiri.

Nah, ini pesan juga nih buat teman-teman (termasuk saya sendiri) yang lagi cari pacar, jangan 'rendahin' diri kamu serendah-rendahnya sampai mau jadi apapun yang calon pacar kamu inginkan ya.

Dan buat yang beruntung sudah punya pacar, jangan mau juga ya dibentuk-bentuk semaunya sama pacar kamu. Sayang sih sayang, justru kalau sayang, terima kita apa adanya dong ! Ya kan?

Terus, buat yang tadinya suka berasumsi soal sifat seseorang. Di minimalisir yuk, jangan pukul rata sifat orang hanya berdasarkan jenis kelaminnya. Ingat, bahwa setiap orang di dunia ini tuh berbeda, nggak ada yang sama.

* Obrolan aslinya panjang lebar banget, proses berfikirnya juga. Jadi agak-agak di singkat dan edit dikit ya. Without change any red lines, surely :)

-NR-

Monday, December 20

4:08 PM

Great experiences --> Global Changemakers Youth Summit 2010

Pardon me for the very very lately post, hope you guys still enjoy it and get some inspirations :) Xoxo...

***

In the first week of August, I followed the online selection for the Global Changemakers Youth Summit 2010 - a large meeting as reasonable as the conference for the youth of the world are active in the social world, organizations, NGOs, and communities of change. This summit is organized by British Council - a great institution based in the UK, which concern of educational and cultural exchanges between countries. Global Changemakers Youth Summit has always been event eagerly awaited by thousands of young people aged sixteen to nineteen years in the entire world , including Indonesia. How could it not? because, the sixty participants who pass the selection process with well is entitled to attend Summit - contains training and meeting with the delegates from other countries, cool organizations, and a lot of competence peoples in London, United Kingdom from 21 - 27 November 2010.

5th and 6th August are my sacred date. More sacred than christmas night, the day when my cat gave birth, or even the world cup finals. Because,on August 5, I’ve sent the English selection form for Global Changemakers Youth Summit, and on the next day I’ve completed the video applications Thank God there’s no problem with the form, but with the video application, I was almost desperate. Video application was made on the last day delivery limit the application, by only using a digital camera with a very ordinary and in a hurry because I was had the preparatory meeting schedule for my youth organization event, and without any editing process or anything to "beautify" the video. In the application requirements,each participant must upload their videos to Youtube and publish it to Global Youth Summit’s Youtube account. Another problem arises, the internet connection in my house is very very slow. Slower than snail that carry three houses at once, snail that hit by a bike out, or even an anemia’s snail. Ah, just very very slow so I didn’t know when the video upload process will finished. Cause I’m very very afraid the timing is not hurried, finally I brought the videomaterial to my organization office, and upload them there. Yeah, it was much better. Finally, all the registration process was cleared.

The period begins excited! Since the sacred day, I don't have a nice sleep and often eat with uncomfortable feeling. Oh no, I'm not falling in love with the actor or celebrity. However, I’m currently thinking about my fate of the Global Changemakers YouthSummit application! "Is that qualify? Passed the deadline? Or perhaps ... not up to the committee at all!" It is a collection of thoughts that are difficult to avoid at the time. Frankly, I'm not a hundred percent sure will select to the next phase - 'interview'. Pray is a must. But for sure, I'd just not too confident for this.

Already fifteen days have passed, but there’s no good news yet. Suddenly, on sixteen day precisely dated on August 23, an astonishing email come from an Australian named Sam, he is the agent of the Global Changemakers who in charge for interviewed me on Wednesday - two days after that email. I really didn’t think I will qualify for this phase. Interviews lasted about twelve minutes via phone was held in the evening when I just finished a comedy show on stage, the mood is still on "betawi-betawian" but I should listen and speak English fluently. Luckily one of my friends kind enough to lend his car for me to get the concentration when doing the interview. Two very contrast jobs on August 23.

September arrived very quickly and unexpectedly! I was really hoping to like ‘Vina Panduwinata’ who always through the September with cheerful. On 5th, an email answered my pray. On September 5th, I receive an email from Global Changemakers Youth Summit 2010 committee , which states I passed! I succeeded and entitled to become a part of Global Changemakers Youth Summit 2010 with other 59 participants whose selected from around the world. Totally speechless.

During September, October, until the first week of November. I’m really focused to preparing myself for this huge International event. Made a passport, bought a suitcase and sweaters, do the questionnaire or some little materials provided, reading related books, apply for visa, and... get in touch with the others Global Changemakers Representatives.

A heavy suitcase, the busy atmosphere at the terminal of Soekarno-Hatta International Airport, dry throat, and an important message from my mother, are accompany my departure to London with a brother from the University of Indonesia who was also a selected Changemaker from Indonesia . November 21, at 0:30 our Airbus plane had touched the cloud, drove us to transit in Doha first, then go on air until arriving at Heathrow Airport, London.

Pick-up session by the British Council staff at Heathrow Airport was very comfortable, we were immediately escorted to the Uplands: the area where we will go through six days for sharing and practicing in future. Wow! Apparently, Uplands are in a slightly remote area, hiding behind hills and cold forest with very little building located near our venue.

Heal myself from jetlag, adjust to the food and air, meet and introduce ourself each other, memorizing the class room and bedroom, are the things we did on the day of arrival. Bit tired, but very excited to launch a real full challenge day, tomorrow!

I love Monday! Especially for Monday at November 22. Days where I and all participants of Global Changemakers Youth Summit 2010 chattering and share our activism experiences in our own respective countries. After that, we start given the 'intake' about Project Management, discussion with friends of our Issues Group (from long time ago before departure, we have set will dealing and work with which issues, Women's Rights is mine), and the introduction of the ‘Sketches' session (short play which should be designed and displayed by each peer group, with the display time and the theme chosen randomly)

23 and 24 November are sweet busy couple days! For two days, me and all participants trained many sessions. There is a session with World Bank Institute, Pamela Hartigan (author of The Power of Unreasonable People). Andy Hansen and David Askins (sports activists), circumference the Skills Marketplace, and for sure, Working Session on Groups and Sketches.

Trip trip trip! Thursday November 25th, we're all full walk around London! Tried London Boat Trip, quick shopping, meeting with leaders of the British Council center, visit the organization to see how they work ( I chose the Oval Theatre – a theatre community who defense for Gay, Lesbian, and other marginalized peoples. Oval Theatre voicing the action through acting on stage, Oya, Me and some friends who went to Oval had the opportunity to test the ability of our improvisation skills ! ) last session is ‘non-stop reception’ contains chat and do the conversations with the officials, ambassadors from various countries, and other Global Changemakers is being or has been engaged in their Global Action Projects.

Please do not say goodbye ... Yup! This is Friday, November 26th. Means this is the last day of Summit! Our busy things on Friday are finalization project, presentations, advocacy, follow-up, super-important session with Caroline Casey, awarding certificates and pledge our palms on top of a big poster, and… farewell dinner We really won’t to call this as a last day, because actually, we will always hold this Global Changemakers family. Although we are separate countries and even continents, we have one vision and mission ie : Make a Change!

Checkout and return back to hometown-Indonesia on Saturday 27th November. Still want there, still want to be with other friends, but yeah, everything must be end. We must return to our own countries, live our busy life, working on projects, and Make a Smiley World!

_NR_